Take the lead… but don’t lead me on.


Written by Kelsay Gault

Because no one likes mixed signals

Image by Murad Osmann Image by Murad Osmann

There’s something to be said about being with someone who makes you work a little bit for their attention. They’re busy and, well, they don’t always have time for you. You’re on your toes – can they hang out today? what are they up to? I hope I can see them. Both ladies and gents feel this excitement when it comes to working for someone’s attention.

Until a certain point.

A friend of mine just recently got out of a 6 month “casual” relationship where they felt like they were led on. How busy is too busy? Are they just being polite? You’ve had “the talk,” but nothing was established. What now?

If you’re the one following the leader…

Have they said they “just feel like they should be single, but love hanging out with you”? 

If yes, stop following. You are being led on.

Do you take them to fancy concerts and on dates, but they just don’t commit? 

You’re being used for attention. 

Do you hang out with them only when it’s convenient for them? 

You’re being used. 

Is there a hesitancy to talk about a relationship, or label what you’re doing as a relationship?

Sometimes caution come from many places, but generally speaking, someone who wants to be with you will be okay with these. 

Be confident that yes, working for someone’s attention can be a good thing in many ways, but that someone else should also be working for yours too.

If you’re a leader…

Ask yourself why you are wasting time with someone you don’t want to be with.

It’s pretty simple. Life can be summed up in 4 letters : YOLO!  Just kidding.

Sort of. 

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